Lobstah Benny: A Martha’s Vineyard Experience

Hello friends!

Today I got back from my first ever trip to Martha’s Vineyard. For 22 years of my life, I may or may not have thought MV was an island off of New York, like Long Island… it’s FINE GUYS. We’re not gonna talk about it.

Day 1: Drunk at Sea

On Friday night, four of my nearest and dearest and I packed ourselves into a car like sardines and headed for the ferry. We were armed with many adult beverages, MANY snacks, and an absurd amount of luggage. See for yourself:

One of my dear compadres works for a liquor brand and brought us some canned, sparkling wine to enjoy on the ferry and BOY was that a bad idea. We all got hammy off of one can but hey, you live and you learn.

We arrived at our luxurious Airbnb, had a family dinner, and then slept like babies.

Day 2: Scary Island

Day 2 hit us like a ton of fucking bricks without us even knowing it. We went to the beach and had a great time drinking, snacking, listening to music, and taking great instas (see below). What we also did was get OUTRAGEOUSLY burned. I mean just brutally roasted.

Evidence:

(young, naive me before I had realized what I had done)

We had a delightful dinner at Sharky’s Cantina (Oak Bluffs) – 10/10 would recommend – and cried ourselves into a slumber.

Day 3: The Breakfast to End All Breakfast

For those of you who don’t know me personally, I am a big breakfast guy, HUGE. WAKEY WAKEY, EGGS AND BACEY.

My MV translators (aka my friends who have been before) recommended we hit up The Black Dog for a classic breakfast. It was a loooong wait with a rude hostess but man, it was worth it.

Just take a peek:

I got the Lobster Benedict and it was hands down the best Eggs Benedict I’ve ever had. Their hollandaise was so light and my lobster tasted like actual butter. Best part? It was only $14.25!! And look at all that claw meat!!

The rest of Sunday was spent shopping and reminiscing about my Benny. What a day.

Day 4: We Outta Here

Sadly, we had to leave Monday so we packed up and headed on a ferry home. It was a delightful trip with some of my favorite people. Go if you get the chance!!

P.S. A running theme throughout the whole weekend was the name game. Restaurant wait? Name game. Ferry line? Name game. It makes time fly by, trust me. To play, we usually pick a category (celebrities or our alma mater) and you start with a name: Tom Brady, and the next person has to come up with a name starting with the first letter of that last name: Ben Affleck. BUT if someone hits you with double initials: Abigail Adams, it goes back to the last person and starts going that way. An example (labeled by people):

1. Lenny Kravitz

2. Ken Jennings

3. Jen Anniston

4. Abigail Adams

3. Adam Lambert

2. Logan Lerman

3. Lionel Richie

It’s addicting – play it!

That’s all for now.

xoxo,

Gossip Glav

Day 3: No, Me First

SURPRISE! I’m in Canada. Toronto, to be specific. I’m here to see my beloved Red Sox play the Blue Jays and boy, it’s been interesting. Today, I’m going to tell you 5 misconceptions I had about Canada. 5. The Big… Maple Leaf? Ok, call me stupid but I didn’t realize that (outside Vancouver) Canada was so urban. Toronto is just high rise after high rise after high rise, it’s nuts! Not to mention, the weekend traffic rivals NYC. I was able to see some beautiful farm land and residential neighborhoods but I was very surprised to see so much commercial development. 4. Niagara MallsCanada is getting their COIN. I, in my naivety, thought Niagara Falls would be in a forest or National Park or something, you know, natural. Hell nah. Straight across from this natural wonder is a full-out, Las Vegas-type casino complete with dozens more hotels, arcades, and every entertainment venture known to man. I respect the game but that was wholly unexpected. 3. It’s all about the money, money, money. Everything is so commercial! At least in Toronto. I’ve never seen so many dentist… stores? They don’t look like American dentist offices at all! There are stores everywhere. Car dealership after car dealership after car dealership! Props to you, Toronto. You must be doing something right. 2. America what? I know Europe had their hand in literally every country way back when but I did not expect Canada and America to be SO different. In fact, Canada reminds me way more of Europe than it does the U.S., the country it literally touches. Upstate NY and the Southern border of Canada are ridiculously close but outside of Niagara Falls where half of the attraction is U.S. territory, there isn’t much U.S. influence. 1. Canadians aren’t all that polite. OK so this might just be an Internet meme but I thought Canadians were supposed to be hella polite. I thought that would mean that Canada’s big cities wouldn’t be full of asshole like America’s are. WRONG! Not only are people impolite but they’ve adopted the European custom of just walking at you/into you no matter what. Mind you, I studied in Ireland and adopted the European fast-walk and perfected the weave and bob technique and I’m still flustered by these people. Disclaimer though, it may just be a Toronto problem because I’ve met a few Blue Jays fans from the outskirts of Ontario and they have been very friendly and kind. Well, that’s all, eh. Maple syrup and moose.xoxo,Gossip Glav